Unsung Heroes

(Climbs up on dusty soapbox and adjusts tie. Pulls wrinkled copy of Coffee Lovers of America out of coat and waves it.) Brothers and Sisters, I am here today to speak to you of those long lost, never remembered heroes that have made such a difference in our lives, but that hardly anyone even stops to ponder. These nameless men and women have given us so much, but are all but forgotten. They have never had a day set aside for the millions of followers to recognize, but today we will honor them.
So many of the things that we enjoy today were first discovered and put to use by people that lived so very long ago. These faceless, nameless saints are the ones who showed us important things like, while disgusting looking, oysters are safe to eat raw. They showed us that if you shove certain types of burning leaves in your mouth, you get a nicotine buzz (Also cancer, but we will ignore that one for now.) These brave souls discovered that if you hit something with a stick long enough it stops moving and you can eat it. So many gifts these ancients gave us.
Perhaps the greatest discovery in all the annals of Man's history has saved countless lives and enriched our lives to no end. Yea, even greater than the invention of the slicing of bread. Of course I speak of the humble coffee bean and the miracles it has worked on our world.
We will never know the name or face of the first person to put bean to boil although it was probably some grand woman of the distant past. More than likely this woman of long ago was looking for some form of food to feed her family and boiled the beans much like we would peas today. I can only imagine the looks of amazement and joy on these peoples faces as they sipped their "soup" and got the first caffeine jolt. It must have been truly amazing.
Thanks to the person who first was daring to boil a coffee bean, we haven enjoyed centuries of pleasure and peace that only the mighty bean can give us. Countless lives have been spared because the coffee soothed our souls and we didn't beat the crap out of people who annoyed us. Now the great beans grow all around the world and come to us in hundred of different types. Our world is richer because of them.
So Brothers and Sisters, take a moment of gentle silence for these unsung heroes and then grab a fresh mug of your favorite blend.