Pondering the Imponderable

My wonderful wife and I had a fight last night. What it was about really isn't important, but it was a pretty rough one. I'd say that on the GDS (That's Grand Doozy Scale) of 1-10, this one prolly deserved a GDS 7.9. Like our fights often do, this one made me think about stuff that I don't ordinarily ponder. My wife made the comment that she was jealous of me.

Needless to say, my mind was officially boggled. My wife is intelligent and very talented with a fantastic job that has kept us financially sound in a period of time where so many people are losing everything. She funny and compassionate with a truly wicked sense of humor. She is, put very simply, AMAZING. So here was this amazing person telling me that she was jealous of me.

Little background for those just joining the blog. I am slightly past fifty, balding and graying. I am legally blind without my glasses and have more join pain than retired Rockettes. I have been without a steady job for well over 5 years and I am also a Diabetic. So I really didn't see much for her to be jealous of.

She explained that unlike 90% in the world, I got to sit down every single day and do work that I truly love. She explained that even though what I did definitely qualified as work, it was a labor of love and that I have been lucky enough to do it since I was 16 years old.

For the record, I am an Author. My first article was published when I was 16 in the wonderful old youth paper, The GRIT. It was entitled “If you don't vote, don't complain.” It earned me a whopping $35.00 which was too bad for a teenager in the Deep South back then. It also gained me some notable fame at School. So needless to say, my path was set for the rest of my life.

Now I am the proud author of four different books, a half dozen short stories and more articles than even I can remember. No I haven't gotten rich off of it (Yet) or had a best seller (Yet), but I have been able to do the thing I love (and sometimes loath) for a very long time. Hundred of people have read my books and a truly mind blowing number people world wide read my two blogs.

I can sit down anytime during the day or night and do something that is not only my calling, but a thing I love. I put down the crazy ideas, worlds and creatures that inhabit my mind and people actually pay me money to read about them. Sure I have had crap jobs in the past (Most of them actually) and will hopefully have another job in the very near future. Yes I have often had to wade through the morass of human stupidity and obstinacy just to pull in a minimum wage job. However, unlike so many people, I have the pleasure of knowing that my real career is so much more than that.

So my wife revealed to me that SHE was jealous of me. My headparts are still aching over that revelation, but I think I understand now. Makes me wonder just how many people out there feel like that. I kind of feel like this is a wake up call for me. Most days, the worlds I create and the things I type come so easily that I don't even think about it all. Even over the past year or so when things didn't flow as easily as they could, I still never pondered how lucky I was to have this gift. In the end, my amazing wife made me think yet again. That is one of the things I love about her.

My final message for the day is simple. If you are lucky enough, blessed enough to be doing something that you truly love, try to remember to be grateful for it. It doesn't matter what it is or how much money it brings you. If you do what you love every single day, be happy for it. You have no idea how many people look upon you with envy.

Brew Long and Prosper

Postscript: Like I mention sometimes, my readership both here and in the Sometimes Its Okay To Be An Ass blog is truly mind blowing at times. A huge number of people in dozens of different countries “listen” to my words every day. I would love to hear from more of you in the comments section to see what you think and hear what you like. Please take a moment or two to make a comment. Thanks!

Kind of like Grandma's Chicken Soup

"Religion is the sigh of the oppressed creature, the heart of a heartless world, and the soul of soulless conditions. It is the opium of the people".

Karl Marx

     As a guy who has spent most of his life in an on again off again relationship with religion and God, I have long pondered the various religions that abound in the world and have often time pissed off religious type leaders with my thoughts and questions.  I once drove a Presbyterian Minister  almost to violence when I pointed out that Christianity had undergone more schisms since Jesus went back home than any other organized religion.  On another occasion, I royally honked off a Baptist Preacher by questioning the validity of any religion where the holiest of holy books came in "Versions."  So you see, I haven't always had a grand relationship with religions and their followers.

     Now as I move into my second 50 years, I am once again finding myself walking the shaky path of enlightenment.  This means I am once again pondering all of the things that I pondered long ago.  I am also pondering other peoples' perceptions of religion along the way.

     So here is the current thing I was pondering today in church when the above quote came to mind.  (And yes the amusement factor of remembering a quote by Marx while in church did enter my mind.)  My thought was, "If there is no God and if all the religions are wrong, does it really matter?"

     Think about it, most religions basically teach a simple idea.  If you are a good person who leads a good life you have a good chance of getting into Heaven.  Many add in help others to that equation.  Sure the idea of what is a good life may vary, but the concept is basically the same.  Do good, be good and teach good so that you may live a better life.

      Shouldn't we all strive to be like that?  Shouldn't we all try to leave the world just a little bit better than we found it?  Why does it matter how we are put on that path just so long as we follow it?  My Daddy always said, "If doing the right thing was easy, everyone would do it."  So if religion gives people the incentive to do good things, then what is wrong with that?
     I hear many Atheists complaining (No Mary not you) about how Religion is useless and stupid.  They rail about how religious people are wasting their time and how religion is being used to spread stupidity.  (Course on that last one I really can't argue sometimes.)  Course I can point out instances of so called science doing the same thing.  Inoculations causing Autism?  Aspartame causing everything from liver failure to dropsy?  The list is pretty long.  I'd say 90% of all Internet Hoaxes are based off some sort of "science."

     If our goal is to do good and cause good in the world, why does it matter how we achieve that goal.  If people having faith in some Big Happy Sky Guy helps them be better people, let it go.  Smile and nod and move on.  We are all on a path to some unseen horizon.  Does it really matter how we get there as long as we finally get there?

Brew Long and Prosper

Life isn't about how long you live, it is about how well you live.

      So above you see two pictures of two amazing animals.  The one on the right is my beloved cat Ash or as I liked to call him, Lord High Commodore Ashington Fluffybutt.  He was in my family's life for over 11 years before illness took him from us.  The goofy mutt on the left is Kilo who belonged to a good friend of mine for all to short a period of time before he was taken from her by Heartworms.  I know that losing Ash left a massive hole in my heart that is still healing so I can guess how devastated my friend must be even though Kilo was only with her a short time.
     One of the hardest thing about having a furry member (or in my case members) of your family is the knowledge that, no matter how well you care for them and how much you love them, the odds are very good that you will outlive them and have to deal with losing them.  It is so easy for many people to focus on that and never know the sheer joy of having these amazing creatures in their lives.
     I think the best thing that these poor fearful people can do is take a lesson from the animals themselves.  To a human, 11 years must seem like a heartbreakingly short period of time.  I mean what is the point of living just over a decade?  However I can promise you that during his brief time on Earth, Ash lived an incredibly full life filled with fun and adventure and more love than most people can imagine.  When he finally passed, he did so surrounded by a family that adored him and he will be remembered for a very long time to come.
     I am not sure how old Kilo was when he passed.  I do know that he was only with my friend for about a week or so.  However and I quote my friend, " While he only lived with us for a little while, he will be forever in our hearts. We take comfort in the fact that he had a great week, playing in the woods, going on long walks, enjoying long scratching sessions, and just hanging out with us. He will be missed."  So for the short time he was here, Kilo was loved and gave love in return.  He will never be forgotten by those he touched.  In the end, isn't that all anyone can really hope for?
     Take a lesson from our pets.  Never be afraid to love fully and go through life with as much joy and zeal as you can manage.  In the end, no one knows just how long they have so get as much living done as you can.

Brew Long and Prosper

With Great Doggies comes Great Responsibilty

So for those of you who don't know, I am the proud owner of two very amazing dogs. I love them dearly and give thanks all of the time for having them in my life. Their names are Trellis and Trina (Hey I didn't name them, they were named when we got them.) Having them has taught me many things over the years, but the past few weeks have taught me a very large new life lesson on responsibly.

As some background, we got T&T almost a decade ago now when a good friend of my wife's told us about this dog that was going to be put to sleep because no one wanted to adopt her. The reason was that this dog and her siblings had been horribly abused as puppies and were simply terrified of everyone. People wanted dogs they could play with not dogs that would hide in fear. So I told the friend that I had a massive half acre fenced in back yard and I was damned if I was going to let a dog be put to sleep simply because it was scared. So that was how we got Trellis. A few weeks later, my wife decided Trellis needed a playmate so we also adopted her sister, Trina.

Over the years since then, these two amazing dogs taught me many lessons in both patience (Getting them to slowly trust us) and frustration (How far we have to go before they are over their terrors and as happy as they could possibly be. But the past two weeks have taught me a lesson in responsibly and how hard it can be to do the right thing.

More background, recently my wife I committed to a major move across country so that she could get a better job. This meant moving our 5 cats and the two dogs a very long distance. The cats were moved with relative ease, but when it came to moving over a 100 pounds of frightened dogs, things were not so easy. It took two tries, two trips and a whole lot of pain (Literally) and effort to finally get my dogs from their previous home to their new one. We will leave off the very large monetary costs of moving them, getting them new houses, new dishes etc. However, it is finally done and my two dogs are adjusting to their new home.

At least twice during this whole business, I pondered just how much easier it would be to just give up on them. Either send them to the pound with the vain hope that someone else would take them in or do like so many horrible people do and simply abandon them to fend for themselves. They cost hundreds of dollars a year in Vet bills. They eat like small ponies and they require flea/tick and heartworm meds every single month. Then there is the fact that even after nearly 10 years, I still haven't earned their trust to the point where they aren't fearful around me.

So because of all of the above, after my first attempt to bring them with me failed (Believe me when I say it was a spectacular failure involving an escape from an “Inescapable Harness” and busted lead leash and being tackled and knocked down by one to help the other escape.), I pondered letting animal control take them. I was so hot, so tired and frustrated that it kept playing through my mind. How much easier my life would be if I just gave up on them. I love my dogs more than anything, but why keep getting beat up over the frustration? I mean so many others give up on their pets so why couldn't I?
The simple answer is responsibility. I knew when I got them that there were going to be frustrating times. I knew that there would be times I would be angry. In short, I knew it wasn't going to be easy. But I accepted that and I still accept it. The abundance of stray and feral animals roaming our country prove that a lot of people have absolutely no problem abandoning their responsibilities as pet owners. They get tired of a pet or don't want to take the pet with them, so they just leave it. If the pet is very lucky, the owner leaves it in a place where it can at least fend for itself. Many times, people leave the pet locked up in their old home or apartment to slowly starve to death.

Now I admit, I could have “Owner Surrendered” the dogs so they would at least been safe, but even if I was tempted, I knew that this idea was a surer death sentence than abandoning them. They are still fearful and shy (Not nearly as bad as when we first got them, but they still aren't the happy interactive dogs most people want.) I knew that if I turned them over Animal Control or even a Pet Rescue Group, eventually someone would have had to have them destroyed to make room for more adoptable pets.

So like I said, this past two weeks have taught me an important lesson in consequences of actions and taking responsibility for those actions. I made what I felt (And still do) was the right choice 10 years ago. I accepted then that the path I had taken wouldn't be easy (And boy was I right), but I did it anyway. The past two weeks have tempted me to abandon this choice to make my life easier. Like most temptations, this one was bright and shiny. I argued with myself that I had done more than enough to help the dogs. I reasoned that after many years, they were never going to fully trust me so why keep trying?

The answer really is as simple as I took on the responsibility of caring for these dogs knowing that it would be for their entire lives. No one forced me to take on this responsibility. I did it of my own free will. I still accept that responsibility with all of the complications and pain that goes with it. I know that there will always be complications, but the rewards I get are worth it. If more people accepted their responsibilities we would have a lot fewer miserable animals roaming and dying in our streets.

As a final note, so far both dogs are doing okay. They are understandably nervous and scared since they have been moved from the only home they can remember, but I have every faith that they will adjust and that we will all be better off for this move. So I will leave you with the immortal words of Trellis MacLeod when her food is late. “Rowr rowr rawr, wuffle wuffle woof.”

Brew long and prosper.